Yes, I used my own ratty bra and the cantalopes I bought on sale 2 for $5

Here are the pictures that I dabbled with today.

They are part of my Cantalope and Boob series.

The picture of me with my arms crossed is actually that of my backside.

I got the inspiration for this project when I placed a large cantalope next to my own naked "melons"

My Significant Other gasped when he saw the comparison. He Always commented they were to big for me as I am a small framed, small boned, five foot three woman.

I myself did not realize they were the same size as this ample fruit.

Too bad my "melons" are not as firm as the cantalopes themselves....*sigh*

Can you guess which me is the one with the real breasts and which one is really a picture of my backside donning a cantalope filled bra?

Scary part of it all is that both set of "breasts" look the same.

on a quest to compile a list of soy free products

I just contacted Giant Foods to find out if there was any soy in their Natures Promise Tuna. I was connected to the nutrition department of Stop N Shop. I spoke to a very sweet young woman who took my phone number and went sleuthing for me.

She called back and after speaking to the suppliers saying that this product was indeed soy free.

I have a can of Nature's Promise Natural Chunk Light Tuna in Water and it does not list that it contains soy like other tuna products such as Bumble Bees or Chicken of the sea.

I am taking her word for it.

However I CANNOT GUARANTEE THE STATEMENT IT IS SOY FREE TO BE TRUE.

I can only hope it actually is.

My eyes are getting all out of whack reading labels constantly.

And my nerves are shot wondering if certain foods are safe for me to eat.

I also posted a question to this company online. I am waiting for this reply as well.

I AM THE AMAZING PICKLE LADY!!!!

So I show up at Brandon's field day BBQ, organized by the PTA (see this should have been a warning to me being I never felt comfortable in the PTA circle. I always feel like the oddball mother, I AM NOT AN ODDBALL, I AM JUST ME!!!) and I do not know ANYONE, except of course my Branman and some of his classmates who ask me if I am Brandon's Mom, and his main teacher, oh and the stunningly beautiful giggle/bubble/huggle sister.

So I ask what I could do and they tell me to put on plastic gloves and pick something on the table to serve, the idea being which is not to let the kids touch anything.

So I wind up on pickle slice/carrot stick duty.

"Would you like some pickles or carrots?" I would ask the kids as they cued pass me....


"Would you like some pickles or carrots?"

"Would you like some pickles or carrots?"
"Would you like some pickles or carrots?"
"Would you like some pickles or carrots?"
"Would you like some pickles or carrots?"

Some kids said "no" some just wanted pickles, some just carrots...one little girl snatched more with her bear hands..
Eventually I tired of "Would you like some pickles or carrots?", "Would you like some pickles or carrots?" "Would you like some pickles or carrots?" and started swinging my hips and singing "PICKLES AND CARROTS, PICKLES AND CARROTS"

The other adults and the kids did not take much notice of my silliness, either that or they were to frightened by the freako pickle lady.

Then the carrots would start talking to the kids "Please put me on your plate, I am nice and crunchy"

If they did indeed desire the carrots I got to inquire as to whether or not they wanted them dipped in honey french dressing.

I had such a noble and important carrot dipping and pickle doling out job

Brandon, btw, wanted both pickles and carrots.

Then there was one of the PTA moms organizing the cheeseburgers into another platter with her ungloved hands, then she would touch the pretzels and then whatever poor ill fated food got in her way.

By the time the kids came up for seconds I was piling carrots on the carrot lover plates.

After the kids ate, with their choice of pickles and carrot sticks and hamburgers and chips, pretzels, and cheese doodles the teacher got to feast. They of course had the kid options as well as roast beef or tuna or seafood salad wraps and macaroni and potato salad, and pasta salad and grilled shrimp.

One Little girl did not want hot dogs or hamburgers and I know she desired the "grown up food". That little girl may as well have been me 32 years ago.

Then came desert, watermelon, one taffy per person, lollipops, and ice pops.

I Basically had nothing to do there as I was not needed so I took a picture of Bran and two of his friends. he in turn gave me ooodles and smoodles of hugs and kisses with such pride in his face that his mother was there.

But eventually I made my departure as I felt like the odd girl out and they do not allow parents to stay for the field day (the school sucks that way). Oh yes and they change the field day from the morning to the afternoon since the rain cleared up.

So I bid adu to Bran and his teacher and left the others without a single "sayanora" because basically they could care less.

And that is the story of the pickle lady.